Etiquette Lesson 2

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Now that you have, by obeying the truth (found in the Bible), made your souls clean for genuine love of your fellow Christians.   1 Peter 1:22

St. Peter in his letter to the Christians in Asia Minor told them that now you have the truth, from God’s word, God wants you to act in all things including in church and in a restaurant in a way that shows your love for God in the way you act.

Your church is often referred to as the Lord’s House. It is a very special place to us as Christians. Our church is where we gather with fellow believers to worship and praise our God. Out of respect to our loving God and in respect to other worshipers, there are some things we should do when attending a worship service.

When you are in the part of the church where we worship (we call it the sanctuary) and you need to tell someone something before the service begins, use a quiet voice. There will be people who are listening to the pre-service music, saying some silent prayers or are studying the Word of God they will hear that day. You do not want to disturb them.

Once the service begins, participate. Here is your opportunity to join your fellow believers in worship. Follow along in the hymnal during the liturgy and join in the singing. A worship service is not a time for sleeping or for games. Listen to what God is saying to you through your pastor.

Try to arrive at church with enough time for you to get to your seat and prepare yourself for the coming worship service. You will want to ask God to guide your thoughts during the service.

Don’t get up and leave to use the rest room unless it is really necessary. You may disturb the worship of someone else.

A worship service is a special time for you and the other people worshipping with you. Use it to thank God and praise Him for all He has done for you.


1 – You are to be quiet in church before the service starts 2 – Use a quiet voice while in church if you must talk

  • – Participate in the church service with singing and responses
  • – Arrive at church at least 10 minutes before the start of the service 5 – Do Not play games, color in coloring books etc. during the service

6 – D Not get up to go to the bathroom during the service, go before the service starts.


For this section we are talking mainly about a nice family restaurant where you sit down for a meal and have a waiter or waitress who will serve you. This is a very public place and there will usually be many other people there so you need to use some special manners.

When you first get to the restaurant, you will probably need to register. Your hostess will then take you to the table. As you follow her be careful not to bump into other tables or people who are eating. That means no shoving or fooling around. When you get to your table, wait for any females with you to be seated first. You can hold the chair for them so they can be seated and then seat yourself. When you sit down at the table, keep your elbows off the table. Don’t sprawl across the table, it is meant for eating.

When you get a menu, look through it. Most menu’s are set up the same with a section for appetizers, another for sandwiches, another for full meals, a section for drinks and another for desserts. Read through the menu and don’t be afraid to ask any questions of your parents, if they are with you, or of the waitress.

You may want to ask the waitress what types of potatoes come with the meal, what kind of salad dressings they have with the salad and anything else you aren’t sure about. Make your decision about your meal. If you need more time to decide, ask the waitress to come back. This gives her time to help someone else and then get back to you.

Depending on how fancy the restaurant is you will have different types of items to use in eating your meal. You may have a bread plate that you can use. You will also have a napkin that is for your use. Once you have ordered, you should put the napkin on your lap.

You may have a variety of utensils to use with your meal. In general, you work from the outside toward your plate when using the utensils. Usually, if you have multiple items they will be spoons or forks. The spoons are usually for soup and for use with coffee or dessert. The forks that you may have would be a salad fork, a meal fork and a dessert fork. The utensils are not toys so don’t play with them. Use them in the way they are meant to be used.

If your meal includes soup, it will usually come first. Use the soup spoon, usually more round in shape, to eat the soup. Don’t pick up the bowl and drink the soup. Another little trick that helps to keep you from spilling on yourself, is to use the spoon moving away from you rather than toward yourself.

The second item you may get is a salad. If there are parts of the salad you don’t like, eat around them or push them to the side of the plate with your fork. Don’t put them on the table or in your napkin.

How you handle your food in the main course will depend on what you are eating. If you are having steak you will probably get a steak knife to use in cutting the meat. Cut it into small pieces and if you trim off waste push it to the edge of your plate but not off. If you are eating chicken, turkey or duck you can use your hands to hold the meat while you tear off pieces with your fork. Ribs are eaten in the same way, with the hands. You will need to wipe your hands often when eating these items.

The last course of your meal may be dessert. Often this needs to ordered separately and there may be a menu just for dessert. Depending on what you are eating, you will use your dessert fork or a spoon.

While you are eating there are several things you will want to keep in mind. Don’t talk with your mouth full. It looks terrible and can spoil the meal for those with you. Don’t burp loudly, if you must burp, cover your mouth with your napkin. Visit with you friends in a quiet manner. There is no need for loud, boisterous talking. You can have a good time without disturbing everyone around you. If you need to talk with the waiter or waitress, motion for them to come or watch for them to come near your table and then get their attention. There is no need for you to holler loudly or wildly wave your arms to get their attention. A good waiter or waitress will be watching to see if you need anything.

When your meal is done, the waitress will bring you the bill. Again, depending on the restaurant, either you will take the bill to a checkout counter or the waitress will take your payment and bring you your change. In either case, you will want to leave a tip for your waitress. Usually, you will give a tip of 15% to 20%, depending on the service you receive. The tip should be left on the table when you leave.


1 – Do not bump into other patrons while you are being taken to your table 2 – Do Not push and shove others while in the restaurant

3 – Females are to be seated first 4 – No elbows on the table

5 – Learn how to read a menu

  1. They usually have sections for different meals or parts of meals
  2. Ask questions if you do not understand something on the menu 6 – Once you have ordered put the napkin in your lap
  3. – Utensils are to be used from the outside in for example:
    1. Salad fork
    1. Meal Fork
    1. Desert Fork
  4. – Utensils are NOT toys
  5. – Food you are not going to eat stays on your plate.
  6. – Always cut you food into small pieces so that they will fit easily into your mouth. 11 – Do NOT talk with your mouth full

12 – Do NOT chew with your mouth open 13 – Do NOT burp at the table

  1. – Do NOT talk loudly at the table
  1. – Tip your waiter or waitress
    1. 15% – 20 % is usual for expected service
    1. Pay with the bill if charging the meal
    1. Leave on table if paying at a register
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